thinking............keep thinking....................

Actually wat I nid?????????wat I want???????????wat I wish for my future????????????????wat life I wish to hv in my future??????????????????wat??wat??wat????????????????????

Whn I started for my internship, my boss oledi ask me thk for all bout it……..it is very important to myself 1…………but y my boss wil ask me during my internship period????wat my intern doing actually?????i thk my close fren wil noe bout it………….

Honestly, I not reali wish to work for my current company for intern….since I had interview for 2 companies, 1 is Chartnexus, another 1 is MGR consultancy, so jz got called frm MGR, den finally decided work for it n start my intern life………..whn I got offer to conduct interview frm MGR, I felt weird tat y they called me went for Great Eastern Mall to hv interview wif me……I tot MGR jz a simple company, who knows tat MGR actually is under GE……..so for my interview tat time, I not reali did well, n sumore my ans way nt reali friendly, quite “chuan” for it…….i felt tat if they dun wan hire me, I aso wont mind or care bout it……n bcoz tat time was at GE mall, their asking way n ques I aso nt reali like it actually…….they aso got mentioned bout tat mayb wil called us do some sale n marketing job, sumthg like do insurance agent for it……..i can felt tat they wish us to b agent……for my 1^st impression thk bout it was “I dun wan b agent….i dislike it….”……>.<……..but cum to the end, I got their called, n said tat I being hire to intern at their company……………

My 1^st day of intern was weird!!!!!!!!!!!!9am arrived office, but the door was locked…………nobody at tat office, jz met my colleagues, aili & Jason…………….den v called to them, they said later wil got ppl opened door for us, n boss brought us went to the nearer Paparich to hv breakfast, yum cha…………………..afterward, they assigned 3 of us followed diff boss………………..i followed my boss tat she very geng & is a nv qiang ren………stressful looooo…………>.<………………….through the chatting session, jz realize tat she was a very successful insurance agent!!!!!!!!is a Unit Sale Manager…………earn million per month!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!she worked for 6 yrs oledi, nw no nid work aso can start enjoy her life, can retire d……………….but b4 tat the road she passed thorough was very difficult & tough……she had put many effort & hardworking, courage for it den oni can success…….so in the beginning, she shared many thg about her experience, idea, mindset......i gained a lot through tat conversation…………….n she got brought us went to agency, v attend morning & night meeting………part time or full time agent shared their case n feeling to us………although reali felt sienz n damn boring for it……….but actually aso can learn sumthg new frm them…………….but all was about insurance thg……………..at tat time, got a GSM invite me & aili went to a room, n he start sharing all his experience to us………..he said "actually u all til young for it, got time n energy so can try everythg, dun jz at thr thk oni, if u try to b an insurance agent, u wil noe u can do it ant, if at the end u fail to do it, u lose nothg, u jz lose ur time, no cost for doing an insurance agent………..so tat time u cont work bek or find a new job or do other thg else aso til got time for it………..at least u got try for it so u wont regret in the future…………"

actually wat he had said was a truth, meaningful aso…………..so at tat time I started thking bout dis matter……………..kept thking……….started confuse n get lost…………so I sharing n chatting wif fren……….ask for their opinion……………….but cum to the end………….i til cant find an ans………………tat time reali wish to chat & discuss wif my daddy……………but til dun hv the gud chance to hv a discussion wif my daddy…………..tat time my boss aso dint called me thk bout it or talk bout the topic again…………….mayb she aso feel tat nt the gud timing for me 1^st…………..so they dint force me or wat……………….n gv a lot of paperwork for me…………….b my boss Personal Assistant 1^st…………………so……………..at last…………………..i aso ignore dis matter………………….stopped thking bout it…………..started avoid dis topic………………….escape for dis matter……………..so I dint found any ans or solution for it………….jz left it aside………………..dun bother it anymore………………so jz did the paperwork at office…………n sum time wil did a small mistake or careless bout my work…………….boss called us did telemarketing & market research………………called ppl do survey………………..>.<…………………..nt reali like to do all tat thg…………………..so started aversion for insurance………………..kept reject by other ppl……………n other ppl jz provided many negative feedback & pessimistic bout insurance………………..so I started dislike & defy insurance, dislike b insurance agent………nt wish to try for it……………..>.<……………………….

But who knows…………….after went to a seminar for 2D1N…………….thr is a changing in my mind……………my boss wished me can attend for dis Career Opportunity Program on 9 & 10/4………….a seminar tat held at Sri Petaling Hotel for 2D1N………food & accommodation r provided…………..sumore the fees, RM220 was paid by my boss………since im intern nw so she sponsor & pay for it……………….my boss called me go hv a look n act as a gud chance to noe more fren, learn sumthg……….so I jz attend it since I reali wish to learn sumthg new & know more new fren……………..i went for the seminar jz for fun……………nt reali serious for it……………..i aso nt reali noe for the whole schedule & detail bout the seminar………………so my boss fetch me to thr………….sumore I was late for it………….@.@...............actually 1.30pm nid registered………2pm started for it……………but my boss called me 1.30pm wait her at office………..sumore she 1.45++ oni cum, so reached thr around 2.20pm…………………feel paiseh since im late for it n all ppl looked at me……..>.<…………..

Jz realized almost all the ppl were around 24++ yr old, working nw actually……n they all felt tat the real working life r tough n the $$ tat earned reali nt enuf for their life……n the important thg was they were nt enuf time to rest or holiday………..kept working for it but jz get little salary……….so they felt tat b an insurance agent, time is flexible, n sumore can earn a lot of $$$$$$$$$$$$............all the experience they sharing were meaningful…………was reali truth for it………..once v graduate & start working life………..reali jz busy all the way…………….no time for holiday……………time is limited……………..

I aso realized tat most of them tat wish to b insurance agent, 1^st at all SURE HATE b insurance agent…………but y finally they wish to b aso leh??????it is bcoz insurance gv a gud opportunity for them to earn $$$$$$ n time is flexible………..n the main point is……….after they noe & understd deeply about the important of insurance……….an insurance claim reali can help many ppls……..once get illness, do operation, or pass away bcoz of accident………there will b a huge $$$$ to help the family members in living expense, pay for the debt………….so actually insurance is needed & important for everyone……………..but y most of the ppl whn heard bout insurance agent wil feel annoy & hate it??????dis is bcoz the attitude of insurance agent………..the 1st impression for the insurance agent is ANNOYED!!!!!!!!!if 1 of ur fren is insurance agent, confirm u wil thk tat whn they gv u a call or find u, sure they wil force u to buy insurance…………….i actually wil thk the same way………….an insurance agent nid always hit for the target, den mayb they can get some award or reward…………so mayb they wil keep call ppl buy insurance………mayb the way they use got abit wrong previously………….but nw………all r used sharing way to promote the insurance product………share for the real story about the life with or without insurance……….if u dun wan buy it, aso nvm…….wont force ppl buy anymore………..

So after the 2D1N seminar, reali learned quite lot of thg frm tat………bcoz I went thr alone, I noe hw to social wif & make new fren………learned the lesson tat shared by the other ppl & lecturer who very success in insurance world ………..hv fun at thr aso~~~~

b4 went for the seminar, all my fren told me tat "it was a “BRAIN WASH” seminar……….after u attend, sure wil bcom an insurance agent oledi"……..>.<……….GOSH……………..i reali being brain wash oledi at the seminar…………reali wish to try to b an insurance agent………….luckily………………at nitez whn hving dinner wif my lovely family……….my daddy successfully help me brain wash again~~~~~~~hv a enjoyable n great chatting session wif my lovely daddy~~~~~~~~he very directly told me tat I TOTALLY not suitable b an insurance agent~~~lol~~~I kept argue wif him~~but finally let him won oledi bcoz wat he told me were TOTALLY truth & meaningful aso~~~my network nt strong enuf at all~~after sell insurance product to my few close fren, den I wil hard to find new market d since I nt reali gud in social………"y a stranger wil buy frm u since got soooooooooooo many insurance agent around them aso???????"lol~~~~~~~ngam betul~~~~~~~~~so at last I nt wish to try b agent anymore although I noe if I wan to do it, I sure can overcome all those prob tat my daddy mentioned~~~but I better dun wan waste too much time in the thg tat I nt reali wish to do~~better focus more on my investment field ba~~~ahahahah~~but I wish to learned more about the communication skill or selling skill frm the workshop tat provide frm them…………..so wish to attend the workshop but who noe………….my Lexmark boss gv me a call tat ask me go to pc fair wif her on tat day………….>.<…………so………………..finally I choose work for pc fair~~~~cant attend for the workshop oledi………..aiiiikkkkksssssssssss…………waste a gud chance to learn thg……………….

***actually reali got fate wif GE………stil rmb tat whn the time I was diploma yr 1 student, tat time wished to get a part time job, den got a fren intro a part time job for us tat can earn million per month, so Catherine & me went for the interview, went for the night meeting, free seminar………….tat time v all oni noe was work as an insurance agent……..at last they needed us took for the insurance exam to take the licence………….so v quit for it………dun wan joined them anymore…………..who knows……………..after 3yrs…………….haizzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

7 working days................

OooooHhhh Noooooooooo..........
jz realize tat i had ignore my blog for almost 2 months.............@.@..............
actually got a lot of thg had been happened around me for dis few month...................
although i wish to share out no matter it was happy, fun, memorable, sad or moody thg............................
but due to my laziness & busyness......................
so all of the memories jz kept inside my heart...........................

worked for 7 days per week...........................
or it can b said tat i work almost for 30 days........................
jz nid the oni 1 word to descried & represent it all..............
TIRED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
i wish to hv a long long break & holiday..............................
@.@

however,
if i thk it at another way,
dis means tat i had fully utilize all my time for each day~~~~~~~~
living life is full~~~~~~~~~~~
although is reali exhausting & tired & suffer.........................
but at least is better than jz staying at home do nothing & jz wasted time & wait it pass...............
& can earn $$$$$$$$$$$$ aso~~~~
stil can enjoy & hv fun during the busy life~~~~~~~~
LIFE IS GREAT~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

im count-downing for 1 week now~~~~~~~~~
my internship end on 15/4~~~~~~~~~~~~
looking forward to the coming of day~~~~~~~~~~~~
can start enjoy my holiday for few week~~~~~~~~~~~
but my new sem start on 9/5...........................>.<
i seem like dint hv a gud rest & slp enuf long time ago d.........................
always fall sick within the laz 2 months............................
nid start recharge my health during holiday 1st......................

HOLIDAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

wow wow wow~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
finally is my turn to enjoy holiday~~~~~~~~~
is time to relax~~~~~~~~~~~~~
3 months ++ holiday is waiting me~~~~~~~~
hehehehehe~~~~

although i thk i not reali did well for my final exam................
can b said definitely not confident for it.....................
"nvm la.....if u had try ur best for it den ok oledi"
but i asked myself........................
"do i had try my best for dis exam????"
the ans was "NO"
"EFFORT"
i got put effort for it..........................
but jz little bit oni.............................
not much................................
so reali disappointed to myself dis time...........................
if get bad result, cant blame anyone.....................
the 1 tat i wish to blame is myself.......................
stupid jennifer....................>.<

Huuuuuuuuuuuuuuu....................
suan le ba~~~~~~~~~
i should look forward better~~~~~~~
after exam~~~~~~
i had enjoyed the time playing wif all my lovely fren~~~~~~~
singk, steamboat, shopping, genting trip, yum cha~~~~~~~~
happy~~~~~~~~~~~
~^.^~

**almost all my $$$$ fly d.........$$ ar $$..............pls faster cum bek........T.T.............

痛

当一个人遭受到痛苦，难过，悲哀，失落，绝望，寂寞……….
当下可以做些什么呢？？
哭？吃？喝？睡？玩？找人聊天？发呆？听音乐？
哭----想哭但哭不出来
吃----没胃口
喝----没感觉
睡----失眠睡不下
玩----没心情
找人聊天----没话题
发呆----最好的方法
听音乐----我最常做的

如果是我
我会发呆听音乐
自我疗伤的一种方法
这疗程可以进行几个小时
虽然不是很有效
但暂时找不到更好的办法

今晚不知为何
心如刀割
莫名的痛起来
很痛很痛
怎样才能忘记痛的感觉呢……………

*cut cut cut*

Finally I beh tahan jor……..after ECON exam, decided to hv a hair cut……….long time dint go salon d…….i thk the laz time I visit salon was on June………..June 2010 – Jan2011………..wow………almost half yr dint zap zap my hair jor………@.@ so messy……………..b4 tat college had organized a event which was “ A Cut Above Charity”………….
paid for RM10 can hv a hair cut + charity……..heard my fren said A Cut Above is a very famous hair salon…….RM50++ per hair cut………..but dis time all is cut by trainee or junior……..afterward mayb their sifu wil help them zap sao mei………@.@........but I wish to try for it………..foosoon & me aso bought the ticket………..who knows………………….whn v went to college hall, saw the environment, saw almost all the “A cut above students” cutting the “tarc students” hair…………… my confident decreasing……………..started worrying……………

since I paid for RM10 d, so wish to try try geh………….but who knows again…………………………..nid take number geh……n sumore nid wait for 50++ ppl den oni was our turned…………….fainted…….@.@...........v sat thr for awhile………den c their turnover………….15min++ baru jump 1 number……………..OMG……………..suan ba………………….finally v gv up…………..jz act as v donate $ for the charity ba~~although the event held for 3 days…………….but afterward I dint went to college anymore since no claz on the following day……………den v met taulun so v gv the ticket to him………..at least dun wan waste it…………

Finally………….aili & me went to the “jia jian hair salon” after v hv lunch 2gether…………….den both of us wash, cut & blow our hair for around 1hr++…………..hahahahaha~~1st time went to hair salon wif fren~~~b4 tat aso went wif mommy………reali diff feel wif fren~~v kept chit chatting at thr~~aili very funny~~~~can blow water wif the shampoo gal aso…….n yuan lai she wil feel very geli whn the shampoo gal helped her massage…………….wahahahahahha~~~n she kept remind the hair stylist bout tat she jz wan zap siu siu, dun wan cut too short, if not she wil cry die…………LOL~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~funny la~~~~~~~~I jz laugh at thr oni~~~~~XD
*dun shy shy la…………..cum looked at the camera~~LOL~~^^

The aunty who helped me cut hair geh……….whole day her face aso looked so dark……….. ask her ques n opinion, she aso no respond………….den I aso no dare talk so much d……….jz simply let her cut…………T.T…………my liu hai………………..she cut too short jor……………n quite straight……….looked like sha po…………T_____________T almost wan zip sao mm dou………….i got a bit regret tim………………called her cut qi zhuang…………..suppose I should cut layer since my hair a bit thick………..aikssssssssssss………………but aili kept console me tat look cute & nice………..aili u too kind & gud jor………T.T dint laugh at me…………..i sendiri aso felt dao my liu hai look funny…………T.T………..even though my mommy aso laugh at me whn I bek home…….she said I look like sha po………..T.T…….hope my hair faster growth la………….if nt whn go to college or work sure laugh by the other…………T.T

*started play self-capturing jor tim after hv a new hair look~~LOL~~~~sorry tat I noe I got abit “zi lian”……………>.<~haha~

**thanks aili for supply her own shampoo & conditioner~~tqtq~~~thus v can save for few $.........so used jor RM30 per hair cut………… although not reali satisfy for it…….but hv a happy hair cut period wif my pig aili~~~~hehehehe ^^

***cham looooo………..seem like toooooo relax for dis exam period…………stil blogging, facebooking, msn……………..I should focus more on my study 1st……………..*study study study*…………….@.@~

01/01/2011~Happy new year!!!!!!!!!!

Yeaaaaaaaaaaahoooooooooooooo~~~~~~
it was a brand new year!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2011~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Although dint join any new year eve celebration, jz stayed at home on tat day………….n planned to countdown at facebook or msn wif my fren de………………or countdown 2gehter wif TV new year eve show………………..but ended up I was countdown in my dream………………..@.@ I was too tired tat time after came bek frm genting……………….actually jz wish to close my eyes to rest for few min oni……….but at the end I fall as sleep around 11.30pm++….....whn I woke up it was 1am++……………@.@ OMG…………..it was over……………aiksssssss…………too bad…………….so I continue slept since til nid to work on 1/1…………….no double payment for working on public holiday again n again………..T_____________T

N sumore my phone sot jor……………………..cant received or sent message to my fren……………..i tot it was the line or maxis prob………….but who noe……………it was my phone prob………..@.@ I restart & switch on again………………walaooooooooo……………received many message n miss call frm my fren………..>.<……………..reali sorry bout tat………….dint reply u all message about the new year wishes……………….paiseh…………. Hooooooooooooray~~~~~~~~~~~~ Although dint hv any celebration during new year eve, but after working, hv a crazy dinner time wif Lexmark colleague---- sally jie, bing gor, william gor & desmond sifu~~~~~~~~~~~~act as a small celebration for new year ba~~~hehehheehheheeh~~~v enjoying dinner time at BBQ Plaza, time square……………….in the beginning, the waiter thr told us tat v nid wait for around 30min oni got seat…………….so v order 1st & chose frm the menu at the waiting area thr…………..LOL~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~funny daooooooooo~~~~~~v keep chit chatting & blow water wif the waiter thr………………especially bing gor~~~~act like super fren wif the waiter………….both of them seem like best fren thr…………..the waiter aso quite friendly & funny~~~~LOL~~~~~~~laugh die me~~~~~~~~~~~den chat chat xia at thr……………….he said got seat for 5 of us d…………….wow~~~~~~I thk v hven wait for 30min den got seat d~~~~~~geng~~~~~~~seem like ban sok & blow water wif them can get some priority~~~~~heheheheheh~~gud~~~~~

V ordered 1 family set tat for 3-4ppl, den add on 1 seafood set & 4 cans of HEINEKEN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!wow~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~it was my 1st time drank beer~~~~~~~~~~~~~I was being persuade by them to order & drank beer 2gether!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!it reali was my 1st time…………………b4 tat I jz drank shandy…………….n til rmb tat time whn my college fren hving new house party, they jz bought a can of Carlsberg, den share share drank for it………..tat time I was jz drank for little oni……….jz taste for it……………it was bitter & not nice………but dis time, I was drank for 1 cup~~~~~~~~~~almost drank a can of HEINEKEN~~~~~~~~~~~the 1st taste for it was bitter…………reali not nice………………….so I jz let the drinks at thr den continue ate the food……………at the end the beer not cold d………….reali not nice to drink…………I tot I wil jz taste n drank it little oni, den wil share the leftover wif other……….n they kept asking me ok anot…….if not ok den let them drink it………but at last the waiter add some ice for me~~the beer bcum cold & nice to drink~~~~~~~~~hehehehehehe~~~so at the end I drank it all!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!woooohoooooo~~~~shuang~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~tat time started felt hot n my face & ears bcum red d………..@.@..............long time dint red face d…………..n sumore I tot my face vry thick geh………..wont easily red face…………..but after drank beer, it was diff way…………my face & ears aso red d……………my fren said bcoz it was the blood circulation………. tat time jz bing gor & me bcum red, so it means both of us very healthy, den William gor & desmond sifu dint red pun……....means they not reali healthy lo????? wahahahahhaha XD

Duno izit all of us almost drunk jor…………den whn eating all the food…………..v all keep blow water again~~~~~~~~~LOL~~~~~~~~~funny nya~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~siao jor~~~~~~~~~~~~quite fun to grill the food 2gether~~~~~~v all 1st time ate for it…………jz William gor got experience for it~~so he taught us hw to grill & the way to eat~~~~~~~LOL~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~sure he always has meal at thr wif miss S…………….wakakkakak XD v all keep make noise at thr again~~~~jz desmond sifu very quiet & jz keep smile at thr…………less join our conversation…………sure he felt tat v all too over & too fai jor………………directly not same as the ppl while working…………..especially bing gor again………………desmond sifu said him y canot has same talking way wif customer…………..after work the reaction & respond bcum faster………called him next time drink some beer 1st b4 start working~~~~~LOL~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~funny!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
*the funny & friendly & fai waiter............or actually he is a manager????if next time who go to BBQ plaza thr hv a meal, can chit chatting wif him, maybcan get some priority~~lol~~




*finished d~~~~~~~~~~~( paiseh........abit messy tim........>.<)


**The dinner ended up wif full of laughter~~~~~reali enjoyed for it~~~~~~~~~~~~~fun~~~~no stress at all~~~~~LOL~~~~~~~hope next time til got chance to hv a crazy time wif u all again~~~~~~~~~~wahahhahahaha~~~~~
***almost addict to drink HEINEKEN jor tim………..cham………… but luckily I dun hv any side effect after drink beer……….dint feel itchy or wat………………n sumore after back home & took bath…………….feel super energetic……………..not sleepy at all…………@.@.................LOL~~~~~but jz feel super sleepy while continue work on Sunday……………..felt super blur tat time……..@.@............ the effect of HEINEKEN was too slow to me…………another day baru effective……………….weird nya……………

Heng dai shopping day

Yoyoyo~~~~~~
3 of us hou heng dai,
honhon---dai lou
tattat--- ee lou
me--- sai lou
I thk v become heng dai since Nov ba………hehehehehe~~although our heng dai relationship jz ngam ngam form……….but 3 of us seem like oledi very sok……….any topic aso can chat……..den decided to go shopping to help renewal n modify tattat…………help tattat chg a new & lengzai look~~~help him bought new trendy shirts, cut a new yeng hair, choose a smart spectacle~~~~~~wahahahahha~~all done it whn 10/12/2010……………3 of us went to time square & sg wang for shopping~~~1st time help a guy chose n bought shirt………quite fun for it~~~~guy’s shirt very easy to buy oni……….n quite nice aso~~LOL~~~~wish to wear it tim………>.< hahahaha~~

b4 tat v had a gamble…..if who get the highest mark for the EA test, den the 2nd highest nid to treat the highest, the lowest nid to treat the 2nd highest………..im so lucky get the 2nd highest~~^.^ den tattat nid to treat me my favorite Mc Flurry~~~~~n tattat so kind aso, wil treat honhon eat~~so tats mean I no nid treat honhon~~~hehehehe~~thx tattat~~~~~
After tat v went to eat the curry fishball & wun zai chi……..wat an unbelievable matter happened………..v all get shocked n the eyes became big big jz look at each other……O.O…..the leftover 2 little curry fishball at the plate which v planned to eat later………..it was being stolen by a guy who didn’t wear shirt………n his hand was taking some plastic trash………the guy directly used his finger, stole the 2 little fishball away………O.O……….v all stunned for few min………den oni awake our 2 little curry fishball being stolen………scary………….but luckily im facing back to tat guy…….dint reali c the face of tat guy………..@.@ pity honhon & tatttat saw it clearly………

After shopping, honhon & me planned to force tattat to cut a new hair look…….his hair quite long & messy actually…………..so v chose a hair salon, treat tattat to hv a hair cut………wahahahhah~~in the beginning he super reject, but at the end aso agree to hv a hair cut~~hehe~~the professional hair director helped him cut a quite short & yeng hair look~~~after cut it d, tattat keep saying he til jip sao mm dou………..lol~~~ quite suit & lengzai de ma~~~~ xi guan jiu hao……….
At night, v had dinner time at sushi zanmai, lowyat~~~~~hehehheheeh~~dis dinner was treat by tattat~~~he said as a pre celebration for my birthday wor~~~~tq very much~~~~~~v ate around RM60++…………..quite nice~~~~~
he strongly recommend us ate the “soft shell crab maki”…….reali delicious for it~~~~yummy~~~~~~hope can hv a meal at thr again~~^.^
**finally get many +ve & good feedback frm all the fren about tattat new look super dim~~~~~~bcome a bluechip nw!!!!!!!market price increase a lot~~~LOL~~~reali bcome more lengzai jor~~~n sumore sot dao many siu mui mui jor~~~~~~wahahahahahaha XD reali dint waste honhon & me geh sam gei to renewal u~~~hehehehehehhe~~~~MISSION COMPLETE~~~~~~